Friday, August 20, 2004
Re: David Beckham as a catalyst for change in the Middle EastFurther to Franklin Foer, there is sort of a bizarre, self-contradictory xenophobia about soccer in the US. It's disparaged as some weird, collectivist import by the same people who sign there kids up for the local team, only to then belittle the game as a girls' sport when the bad-ass US women's team bodyslams a bunch of commies like the Chinese in 1999. Whatever. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that the US men's team is smarter, better looking and, well, more gay than your average Joe.
posted by Jon Ihle at 12:25 PM | link |
Mission accomplished?
You know things are going badly in Iraq when the National Review starts to complain. Paradoxically, the American mistake in Fallujah was not killing too many people (as war opponents charged at the time), but withdrawing before killing enough.
This operational hesitancy has characterised the US war effort from the start - or at least from May 1, 2003, when GW Bush prematurely declared an "end to hostilities". At the time, this meant US forces were somewhat restrained from pursuing to finality the remnants of the Iraqi military who have long since regrouped and begun tormenting, together with al-Sadr's militia and assorted foreign terrorists/intelligence operatives, the Iraqi people.
Now, of course, we have the deadly farce in the "holy city" of Najaf, where alienated Shi'a are flocking to support the jumped up, egomaniacal imam Moqtada al-Sadr, who could have been arrested/killed months ago, but instead was allowed to hang around and plot insurrections. As the New Republic points out, Bush is flinching again - or at least taking his eye off the ball - something the pro-war camp would mercilessly criticise if Kerry or Clinton did it. Also, US forces are now subject to two political masters: the usual crowd in Washington and the new sovereign Iraqi government, which seems capable (at least) of making its own disastrous calculations, putting the Americans in the policy objectives vs. democracy bind anticipated by Dick (via Kevin Drum).
The two big dangers here are 1) that Sadr succeeds in hiving off a Shi'ite enclave and Iraq fragments into informal, semi-autonomous, warlord controlled zones outside Baghdad and 2) Washington sees the shortest distance between two points as turning Iyad Allawi into "our bastard", thus prioritising near-term stability at the expense of long-term democracy. It doesn't have to go this way, but it's never been more likely.
posted by Jon Ihle at 11:44 AM |
link
|
Marxist propaganda
Yesterday was the 27th anniversary of the death of the Marx that was described as, along with Jesus Christ, the most influential figure in the history of humanity, and not necessarily in that order. And no, I am not talking about Karl Marx, he has been dead for a longer time. Groucho is the Marx that I have in mind. As a long time Marxist I have always wanted to pay tribute to the man with the grease-paint moustache, the semi-permanently arched eyebrow and the wagging cigar.
Naturally, considering that this is mainly a political blog, I looked online for articles celebrating Groucho whilst bringing the other Marx into the fold. The only thing I found were two equally lame editorials in (but isn’t this already funny?) USA Today and AlJazeerah. The tribute in USA Today made two points: Karl Marx wasn’t very funny. Groucho Marx was. However, Karl Marx’s mother, Sarah Marx, was no slouch when it came to quips, having declared: ‘I wished my son wrote less about capital, and accumulated more of it.’ The USA Today editorial also over-sentimentalised Groucho’s persona, presenting him as a good old time American comedian. I think that this was belabouring the contrast between the two Marxes a little bit too much, since it is hardly necessary to point out that Karl Marx was not an American comedian, no matter how much he makes Americans laugh. Most importantly, it wasn’t very true either. I think that presenting Groucho as a decent old time entertainer is less true to his memory than (not) mentioning the fact that he contributed to a Soviet fund during World War II (of course, this was WWII, and the Soviets after all helped win it in a spectacular fashion), or that the FBI had a nice fat file with his name on it, since he had vocally opposed McCarthyism during the witch-hunt.
Groucho was not a particularly nice person -if you want a nice Marx brother, you should look no further than Harpo, as his wonderful autobiography, Harpo Speaks!, attests. Julius Henry Marx, as his parents named him, was troubled already from his youth, having a mother who ignored him in favour of her oldest and favourite son, Chico. He was an avid reader since his childhood and the one Marx brother who harboured intellectual aspirations - he kept very amusing (on his side) correspondence with T S Eliot, who wrote to him first to ask him for an autographed photo. To his chagrin he had to witness his brother Harpo, who might have had trouble spelling T S, be welcome into the fold of the Algonquin Round Table and become the darling of George Bernard Shaw, whilst his own attempts at being accepted as a credible intellectual were largely unsuccesful. The man who quipped ‘here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!’ was also, not surprisingly, a spectacularly bad husband. On the subject of women he had plenty to say, specially when leering at their physique was involved: ‘anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot,’ and ‘a man is as young as the woman he feels,’ are but two of his one-liners on the subject.
If his personal life was unsavoury at times, and he could be sarcastic and cruel to those closest to him (particularly his first and second wives), underlining the fact that he was not a happy individual, he managed to feed his personal anxieties and restlessness into his comedy in a manner that has survived the 90-odd years since his beginnings in vaudeville. No wonder one of his most celebrated quotes is ‘I don’t want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member,’ a glorious self-deprecating put down that highlights the contradictory nature of the Groucho persona: the social and sexual inadequate masquerading as a witty quick-fire lampoonist. You can see the seeds of Woody Allen (a self-confessed Marxist himself) just in that line, even if Allen's own version of the same persona weighed heavier on the anxious than on the aggressive.
Somebody described the Marx Brothers as a Freudian construct, with Harpo as the Id, Chico as the Ego, and Groucho as the Superego, and the ridiculous and hilarious surnames of the characters he played on screen encapsulate this to perfection. They are all saturated with mock-authority and inflated pomposity: Captain Jeffrey T. Spaulding, Rufus T. Firefly, Professor Quincy Adams Waggstaff, or Dr. Hugo Z Hackenbush. In contrast to Groucho’s mock-authoritarian and highfaluting character names, Chico’s names always had a salt-of-the-earth faux-Italian ring (Chicolini, Barovelli), and Harpo’s were clownish and infantile (Stuffy, Pinkie).
The best Marx Brothers' pictures, devoid of any discernible plot or hint of sentimentality, are so chaotic and irreverent that they make Monty Python look as manic as a tea party at the vicar’s house. They seemed to be as uncontrollable on set as off it: a distraught director had a jail cage built to keep them locked between takes. I believe that’s why their brand of humour has endured more than Charles Chaplin’s mixture of Victorian sentimentality and slapstick or Buster Keaton’s quasi-Beckettian sobriety. Late twentieth-century and early twentyfirst-century culture, and specially its comedy, is anti-authoritarian, savage, impatient, and destructive. There are three cultural movements in the 20th century whose legacy and impact on popular culture I consider enduring, they are: surrealism, punk, and the Marx Brothers (and not necessarily in that order). When I think about it now, they seem to me to be variations of the same thing: the Surrealists adored the Marx Brothers, and Salvador Dali painted Harpo’s portrait and wrote a ridiculous script featuring a lobster-telephone for a potential (and un-filmable) Marx Brothers movie; and what was Johny Rotten, with his ripped business jackets and his Anti-Christ/Anarchist word-play but a belated more aggressive-less anxious Groucho? Consider this last comparison a little bit far fetched? Think about it twice. When Groucho was asked in an in interview if he thought that Nixon had any hope, he retorted that the only hope he had left was his own assassination.
Although lampooning authority was always top of Groucho’s agenda (shouldn’t it always be?), as he played a farsical professor pursuing the college-widow (yeah, I don’t know what a college-widow is either) in Horse Feathers, a ridiculous explorer in Animal Crackers (where he interrupts the action to address the camera directly and break into a ‘strange interlude’; come again Monty Python, Woody Allen?), or a stowaway fooling customs officials by pretending to be Maurice Chevalier in Monkey Business; his apotheosis as a political lampoonist is to be found in what is considered to be by many the best Marx Brothers movie: Duck Soup. Set in the imaginary Republic of Freedonia, it features Groucho as an unlikely (or actually, in view of recent ideological shifts in the Western world, likely) head of state, with Chico as his incompetent secretary of war. Gems like: ‘A five year old could understand this. Quick! Somebody fetch me a five year old!’ could very well have been secretly taped at the Oval Office in the last 3 years; whilst the wonderful ‘he looks like and idiot and talks like an idiot, but don’t let that fool you, he really is an idiot’ could be used as a fairly accurate description of its current occupant. Though, this works two ways: Dubya also has his own Groucho moments, as when he declared:'I have opinions of my own- strong opinions- but I don't always agree with them'. But then again, Groucho had the last word on realpolitik with his quip: ‘Those are my principles. If you don’t like them I have others’.
Groucho Marx died on the 19th of August 1977, three days after Elvis Presley's death, which deprived him of the limelight that should have been finally his. By the time of his death he had become a national institution with the TV quiz You Bet Your Life, his old vaudeville garb now discarded (though never forgotten, as durable an icon as Cleopatra’s profile or Napoleon’s hand and hat). Groucho Marx belonged to a tradition of great comedians, having created a persona that encapsulated his own fears and anxieties, whilst relieving ours through chaos and irreverence. In addition to this, as his own disciple Woody Allen wrote about him, he makes me laugh.
posted by Diana Perez Garcia at 8:00 AM |
link
|
--------------------
Thursday, August 19, 2004
David Beckham as a catalyst for change in the Middle EastIt's always fascinating to relate the world of football to the real world. It can be distracting to the concerns of the 22 people on the pitch, but the passions and rivalries integral to the sport offer a gaze that can sometimes be more riveting than the activities on the field. Franklin Foer looks at these passions and rivalries in a new book, How Soccer Explains the World: An Unlikely Theory of Globalization. An interview with him on Motherjones gives some ideas of where the book might take us.
"At the same time, soccer is about more than mere tribalism. The sport is further along in the globalization game than any other economy on the planet."
About Barcelona: "There's this vision of what a liberal society should look like that's embedded in the concept of the team and the Catalan nationalism it represents."
On John Kerry-type pinko soccer lovers: "As a fan of the game, you constantly confront people who shit all over it. You go to work and the guy in the next cubicle tells you how it's a pinko, homosexual game. If you turn on sports radio, you hear guys like Jim Rome jump all over it. So why is there such hostility towards the game here? Interestingly enough, reading through the clips and the transcripts, it seems like there's a direct correlation between soccer-haters and baseball fans. Baseball, of course, is the ultimate American tradition. And baseball fans face one fundamental fact: their game is in decline. Little kids don't play it anymore, because they're switching from Little League to soccer. So the reason it’s a small touchtone in the culture war is that there's some anxiety over baseball's decline, to some extent."
posted by Paul at 3:57 PM | link |
Today's lesson: never trust Jimmy Carter
Earlier in the week, after Jimmy Carter approved the results, I conceded that Hugo Chavez had won his recall referendum (see comments). It appears I may have been too credulous: the IHT is reporting evidence of electoral fraud in Venezuela.Evidence of foul play has surfaced. In the town of Valle de la Pascua, where papers were counted at the initiative of those manning the voting center, the Yes vote had been cut by more than 75 percent, and the entire voting material was seized by the national guard shortly after the difference was established.
More to come, no doubt.
Three machines in a voting center in the state of Bolivar that has generally voted against Chávez all showed the same 133 votes for the Yes option, and higher numbers for the No option. Two other machines registered 126 Yes votes and much higher votes for the No. The opposition alleges that these machines, which can both send and receive information, were reprogrammed to start adjudicating all votes to the No option after a given number of Yes votes has been registered.
Although the Organization of American States and the Carter Center have called the election free and fair, their quick count justifying this statement was also based only on the numbers provided by the voting machines.
posted by Jon Ihle at 10:19 AM |
link
|
--------------------
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Re: How good are Ireland's schools?Following on from my earlier post on this topic, William Sjostrom has responded by adding some remarks to his original post:
Dick O'Brien at Back Seat Drivers tells us that Irish schools are good, because they are better than the government schools provided in most other countries. In other words, I should be happy with the bad service I have gotten from Ireland's mediocre state airline, Aer Lingus, because, heck, it is way better than SABENA, the Belgian state airline so bad it was dubbed S(uch) A B(ad) E(xperience) N(ever) A(gain).What's wrong with Aer Lingus?
Seriously though, the reason I wrote the piece was because a reader outside of Ireland may get the impression that our public schools are quite bad. Now, as to William's follow-up, he would have a point if I really were comparing just state schools, as he claims. But the figures I quoted are for all students, both in public and private schools.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 6:10 PM | link |
Hugo Abú
In yesterday's Irish Times, Michael McCaughan described the idea of a guarimba:
"The opposition may well rein in the dogs of war while foreign dignitaries walk the streets of Caracas, but by next weekend they will probably be ready for a guarimba, Venezuela's remarkable upper-class intifada. Magical realist master Gabriel Garcia Marquez would have been hard pressed to invent such a phenomenon, which involves burning barricades and urban insurrection led by yuppies in designer clothes."
Greg Palast, another journalist who has spent much time in Venezuela, also highlighted the nature of these protestors:
"There's so much BS and baloney thrown around about Venezuela that I may be violating some rule of US journalism by providing some facts. Let's begin with this: 77% of Venezuela's farmland is owned by 3% of the population, the 'hacendados.'I met one of these farmlords in Caracas at an anti-Chavez protest march. Oddest demonstration I've ever seen: frosted blondes in high heels clutching designer bags, screeching, "Chavez - dic-ta-dor!" The plantation owner griped about the "socialismo" of Chavez, then jumped into his Jaguar convertible. "
There are some enlightening scenes of neighbourhood watch meetings in wealthy suburbs of Caracas in the documentary that Diana referred to, made by two Irish film-makers. During one such meeting, the residents are warned that their house servants may be Chavista spies and to watch out. That's page one of the Bolivarian revolution for you...
It got me to thinking as to what would bring out our own Irish crop of frosted blondes onto the fighting streets of Dublin.
posted by Paul at 5:55 PM |
link
|
Going Postal
US cyclist Tyler Hamilton has just won the Olympic gold for the time trial in Athens. Ulrich came a disappointing seven, specially considering that this race was meant to be the start of a new season for him after the Tour. Hamilton's victory (along with the excellent performance of the US Postal team at the Tour) indicates that Lance Armstrong is not an isolated phenomenon in US cycling. No doubt both events will help popularise the sport in the US. If Jon's predictions about the US soccer team winning the next World Cup prove right, we could be witnessing the flourishing of minority sports in the US. Interestingly, cycling, in its most prestigious races, requires that viewers have the patience to wait for results, unlike more immediately satisfying and self-contained sports like football or baseball. Soccer matches produce very low scores and are relatively slow moving, in contrast with again football, or basketball (both very popular in the US).
Speaking of basketball, I hear that the US basketball team is not doing great at the Olympics, at least a loss against Puerto Rico and a very close win against an excellent Greek team indicate that this is the case.
Will everybody go Postal in the US? Only time will tell...
posted by Diana Perez Garcia at 4:45 PM |
link
|
Sleeping without the enemy
Are you afraid of terrorists breaking into your suburban semi in the middle of the night? Do you lack the guts to load the Kalashnikov and put your family out of harms way? This human-safe cum entertainment-centre might just be the ticket for you! Keeps you protected from evil doers, abductors, tornados, volcano eruptions, and the bubonic plague in comfort and style. I am ordering now!
posted by Diana Perez Garcia at 2:30 PM |
link
|
1 Finland 546 2 Canada 534 3 New Zealand 529 4 Australia 528 5 Ireland 527 6 Korea 525 7 United Kingdom 523 8 Japan 522 9 Sweden 516 10 Austria 507 11 Belgium 507 12 Iceland 507 13 Norway 505 14 France 505 15 United States 504 16 Denmark 497 17 Switzerland 494 18 Spain 493 19 Czech Republic 492 1 Korea 552 2 Japan 550 3 Finland 538 4 United Kingdom 532 5 Canada 529 6 New Zealand 528 7 Australia 528 8 Austria 519 9 Ireland 513 10 Sweden 512 11 Czech Republic 511 12 France 500 13 Norway 500 14 United States 499 15 Hungary 496 16 Iceland 496 17 Belgium 496 18 Switzerland 496 19 Spain 491 1 Canada 51 pc 2 Ireland 48 pc 3 Japan 48 pc 4 Korea 40 pc 5 United States 39 pc 6 Finland 38 pc 7 Norway 38 pc 8 Belgium 38 pc 9 Sweden 37 pc 10 Spain 36 pc 11 France 34 pc 12 Australia 34 pc 13 United Kingdom 29 pc 14 Denmark 29 pc 15 New Zealand 29 pc 16 Netherlands 27 pc 17 Iceland 26 pc 18 Switzerland 26 pc 19 Greece 24 pc 1 United States $10,240 2 Switzerland $9,311 3 Austria $8,430 4 Norway $8,333 5 Denmark $8,302 6 Canada $7,764 7 Sweden $7,524 8 Italy $6,928 9 Australia $6,904 10 Germany $6,849 11 Japan $6,744 12 France $6,708 13 Belgium $6,544 14 Iceland $6,446 15 Netherlands $6,125 16 Finland $6,003 17 United Kingdom $5,592 18 Spain $5,037 19 Ireland $5,016
How good are Ireland's schools?
William Sjostrom at Atlantic Blog doesn't sound too impressed with Irish public schools. As a product of the public school system who knows what an adjective is, I was a little surprised to hear this. Had things gotten so bad since I left school?
Worried that I too might have to start saving for a private school, I decided to look into this. But how do you figure out if Ireland's public schools are any good or not? I guess the best way to do it is try and compare performance with education systems in other developed countries. Fortunately, the OECD has a handy study from 2003, Education at a Glance. It contains a wide range education statistics from all OECD countries.
Readers outside Ireland mightn't know that vast majority of students here are educated in state funded schools and colleges. This is reflected in the fact that 96 percent of investment in primary and secondary education here comes from the state.
Perhaps one way of assessing how good our education system is may be comparing the educational standards in school leavers, who are typically around 17 years old. Now the OECD doesn't have any statistics on this age group, but it does on 15 year olds, which is good enough for me. For example, it compares the reading proficiency of 15-year-olds on the PISA reading literacy scale. Here's the top twenty OECD countries:
We're number five? That wasn't what I expecting from our lousy state school system. Perhaps trying another indicator might throw a bit of light on the subject? How about the performance of 15 year-olds on the PISA mathematical literacy scale. Here's top twenty countries:
Well, we're number nine. Not as good as literacy, but we're still in the top ten. What's going on here? Perhaps reading and maths isn't everything. After all, you'll need a lot more than that to get a college education. Perhaps our numbers of tertiary (third level) graduates will illustrate this. Here's top twenty countries for completed tertiary education amongst 25 to 34 year olds:
Now I'm really scratching my head. Only Canada has more young third level graduates than us? Perhaps our public education system isn't too bad after all? Then again proponents of private education may argue that our system is inefficient, that we spend too much money on attaining such high standards. Well, let's see. The OECD has also compiled statistics of spending per student in the year 2000. Here's the top twenty:
Now that's strange. After being in the top ten for reading and mathematical ability, and having the second highest proportion of young university graduates, we're languishing down at number nineteen in terms of per head spending on education. Who would have known? You'd be tempted to ask what would happen if we were spending more.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 12:17 AM |
link
|
--------------------
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
Threatening the pressIt appears that the new Iraqi security forces aren't exactly living up to expectations. Sunday's Observer reports on how some have reacted to Moqtada al Sadr's rebellion:
Concern over police support for al-Sadr emerged on Friday as thousands turned out to demonstrate in support of the cleric outside the so-called Green Zone, home to the US and British embassies and the interim Iraqi government. Police officers at a nearby station began waving posters of the radical cleric and joined in chanting 'Yes to Moqtada. No to America'. A police truck arrived at the demonstration filled with uniformed men who began chanting pro-Sadr slogans along with the crowd. In the ensuing frenzy, the police truck was surrounded and its loudspeaker put into use by the demonstrators for additional chanting.What's more, those still following government orders aren't exactly behaving themselves as this disturbing report from yesterday's Telegraph reveals:
In Najaf journalists were summoned yesterday morning by the city's police chief, Ghalab al-Jazeera...the police chief delivered a blunt warning: journalists had two hours to leave Najaf or face arrest. Mr Jazeera's official explanation for the decision was that police guarding the hotel had found 550lb of dynamite in a car nearby. That seems unlikely. The police rarely venture out of their stations and the street outside the hotel is almost always deserted...Shortly after the deadline expired, the first bullets struck the building. But the sniper was almost certainly an Iraqi policeman, given that the Mahdi army fighters were more than two miles away. Then armed police raided the hotel and tried to arrest the journalists, before imposing a new two-hour deadline to leave the city. A deputation of journalists was denied an audience with Najaf's governor, Adnan al-Zurufi. The policeman outside his office was brusque. "If you do not leave by the deadline we will shoot you," he said.Why shoot at armed militants when you can shoot at unarmed men? You could get yourself hurt, after all.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 7:29 PM | link |
Chavéz, democracy and Iraq
The always interesting Kevin Drum makes an thought provoking point about the situation in Venezuela:It's one thing to denounce Chávez's methods, which are indeed incendiary and authoritarian, but it's quite another to approve of a military coup as a way of removing him from office, and this is one reason that I'm less than convinced that the neocon devotion to democracy promotion is genuine. Everybody says they're in favor of democracy, but it only means something if you support it even when the winner is someone you loathe. If neocons weren't willing to denounce a military coup in Venezuela two years ago, what are the odds that they'll continue sticking up for democracy in Iraq if the majority there turns out to be hostile to the U.S. — as is likely to be the case? Pretty slim, I'd say.
And with 32 per cent of Iraqis strongly strongly supporting Moqtada al Sadr and another 36 per cent saying they somewhat supported him, that question may be relevant sooner rather than later.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 5:12 PM |
link
|
Yes, we'll take democracy...but only if we win
Whilst Chávez-skeptics in the world of Irish blogging seem to accept the pro-Chávez results in the recent referendum held in Venezuela (see comments section in yesterday's post by Dick), the Venezuelan opposition is having trouble swallowing Sunday's democratic pill. According to online Venezuelan newspaper Tal Cual Digital (in Spanish in the original):Enrique Mendoza, leader of the opposition coalition ‘Coordinadora Democrática', declared to journalists at a press conference last night that they had no choice but to challenge the results.
This begs the question as to why the opposition coalition did not denounce the alleged irregularities happening during those weeks and months previous to the referendum held on Sunday. Tal Cual also reports that:
He added that technicians from the coalition had documented ‘in detail’ alleged irregularities in the referendum, and others ‘perpetrated weeks and months during which the officialist majority at the National Electoral Counsel (Consejo Nacional Electoral) had created the conditions to try to undermine the will of the electorate.'Mendoza also stated that proof of electoral fraud, of which he did not disclose any particulars, will be forwarded to Colombian and US ex presidents César Gaviria and Jimmy Carter, whose organizations have monitored the transparency of the electoral process.
As was to be expected, Chávez was quick to the draw, also according to Tal Cual:
Both Gaviria’s organization, the Organization of American States (OEA), and the Carter Centre endorsed Chavez’s victory, and urged the opposition to present evidence to the contrary; adding that they had not themselves detected any sign of fraud with the tools used to monitor the results, which have been successfully used to monitor elections in other countries in the past.Meanwhile, in anticipation of the opposition’s challenge of the results, Chávez underlined that his victory at the referendum had been ‘clean, transparent and overwhelming’. He also suggested that an armed attack against alleged opposition supporters in a protest against the alleged electoral fraud held in a Caracas square could very well be part of an opposition plan to create a climate of unrest after the referendum.
For those who might be out of touch with Venezuelan politics in recent years or skeptic as to Chavez’s accusations, I recommend Kim Bartley and Donnacha O’Briain’s excellent documentary on the aborted coup in 2002, ‘The Revolution will not be televised’ (details and review of which, here), which documents a similar manipulation of pro-chavistas shooting at anti-Chávez demonstrators.
Chávez also added that the gunmen at Monday’s attack had pretended to be Government followers, by adopting typical “chavista” clothing.
Oh! I forgot one last quote. Opposition leader Mendoza also declared at Monday's press conference: 'The only way to guarantee that the democratic process is clear and transparent in Venezuela is to announce a clear and transparent win by the opposition'. Shoot! You got me! I made that up!. But then again, for some, fiction is truer than fact...
posted by Diana Perez Garcia at 3:15 PM |
link
|
--------------------
Monday, August 16, 2004
Chavez aheadIt looks like Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez may have survived yesterday's recall referendum. Preliminary figures indicate 58 percent of voters opted to keep him in office.
Reuters is also reporting a drop in oil prices as a result of the predicted Chavez victory.
UPDATE - 5:30PM: The opposition in Venezuela is claiming that the result is fraudulent, alleging that the result does not conform with their own exit polls. Much hinges on the verdict of independent observers, the Carter Centre and the Organisation of American States (OAS). One Venezuelan website is claiming that Carter has already said he was satisfied with the vote. At the time of writing, however, neither had issued an official statement.
UPDATE - 8:00PM: The Carter Centre has announced its verdict on the Venezuelan recall referendum:
Former U.S. President Jimmy Carter, who led a mission to monitor the vote, said verification by observers tallied with preliminary results from the National Electoral Council, which gave Chavez 58 percent of the vote. "We have so far not found any element of fraud in this process and we want to be clear about that," said Carter, who has worked for more than a year to end Venezuela's simmering political crisis.I guess that answers a few questions.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 7:44 AM | link |
New faces
Continuing on our mission to take over the world, we've decided to recruit a few new contributors. Soon Diana Perez Garcia, who's already no stranger to Back Seat Drivers, will be contributing to the site. In the meanwhile, a taste of more of what's to come. The following is a Castilian Scum Production.
posted by Dick O'Brien at 12:55 AM |
link
|
GREECE
A Castilian Scum Production©
If countries were people
Last week we saw our very own Dick O’Brien get a little bit upset about a post by John Fay at Irish Eagle about his prediction of anti-American sentiment in Greece at the Olympic games. This opened up a bit of debate in the comments section about the extent of America’s involvement in the 1967 coup in Greece. We must admit that we were a bit alarmed at first by John’s choice of words when describing his feelings about the Greeks’ (predicted) lacklustre reception of American athletes at the games. John felt that ‘the Greeks are no friends of America’. At first we were a bit puzzled as to how one can befriend a whole country (as it sounded a bit like a 'God told me to do it’ concept), but then we were quite taken with the idea of this wonderful possibility, and had our own internal debates as to which countries we would like to befriend, and why. To give you an idea, we thought that Mexico and Russia would be great friends to go on a 3-week bender with, but not so good if what you were after was a friend to go drinking moccacinos with. Equally, Switzerland might be a good friend if you needed a loan, but not brilliant if what you wanted was an opinionated buddy to quarrel about politics over a few pints. We were so taken with the idea that we then thought, hey, wait a second! What if countries were people? What would that be like? And what if people were straightforward and told it like it is? The following is our attempt at sorting out the Greece-USA controversy by means of answering those burning questions.
If Countries Were People, and People Were Straightforward, Part I: How to Make Friends and Influence People
(Interior, a bar, it’s day time outside, but the shutters are down and they only filter sparse rays of light that reveal specs of dust and swirling clouds of smoke from the few punters in the place. GREECE sits at the bar, nursing a glass of Ouzo with ice, the ice-cubes are halfway melted. He is a stocky middle-age man with dark hair and a stern expression; his face is covered with a few days stubble. A cigarette dangles from his mouth in a downward curve of ash that he has not bothered to flick in the ashtray. Finally the ash falls on his white cotton slacks and he sweeps it with his hand in an absent-minded manner. He is lost deep in thought, and heavy rings shade his lids as if he has not been able to sleep in a few days.)
(To the barman in a low husky voice)
Give me another one of this, will you? No ice this time, it dilutes the stuff.
BARMAN
(In a friendly tone. We realise that he has known Greece for a long time).
Don’t you think you’ve had enough? This is your sixth glass of Ouzo. You ought to get going home. Grab some sleep. You’re starting to look grey. A bit of sunlight and fresh air would do you good.
GREECE
(In a world-weary tone, that reveals only the slightest hint of irritation).
What’s the matter with you? I just wanna drink. I pay, and you give me a drink. I need a barman, not a nurse.
BARMAN
That’s part of the problem. You don’t pay anymore. You have a tab running the length of Marathon. You know, that loan is not gonna last you for ever.
VOICE COMING FROM ENTRANCE OF BAR
Give my buddy that Ouzo, I’m buying. And a Bud for me.
(Greece turns round and looks at the newcomer. He is tall and well built and has a likeable clean-shaven face. He is tanned. His blond hair reflects the sunrays filtered through the shutters like a halo. He ambles toward an empty stool next to Greece and winks at the barman, who shrugs his shoulders. It is obvious that Greece knows the newcomer, and is not too pleased to see him.)
AMERICA
(To Greece, flashing a convivial smile and gesturing towards the empty stool).
Mind if I sit here?
GREECE
(Looking straight ahead onto the wall behind the bar, taking a drag of his cigarette. He exhales and speaks.)
It’s a free country. The stool is empty. Suit yourself.
AMERICA
(Undeterred by Greece’s unfriendliness, in a sunny voice.)
Me and a few buddies are playing some ball around seven. Do you want to come? We’re expecting a good crowd. You know, nothing major, just a few guys playing for fun. Have a beer, maybe a hotdog. Cheer on a bit. We’re having a barbecue in my house afterwards. What do you say?
GREECE
(Still staring straight ahead. He takes a sip of his old Ouzo, and pushes the fresh one away from him. He sighs.)
(To the barman) Give me another Ouzo, I didn’t order this one. (Turning to America, with a hint of sarcasm in his voice) Look, it’s very kind of you to come all the way here to invite me to your game and your barbecue. Really, seriously, I appreciate it. You are very busy, and I bet it took you a long time to drive to this bar from your place with all the traffic. No, let me be honest, because what I said is an understatement of my real feelings at present. Frankly, I admire your balls for coming in, and sitting on that stool, and talking to me. And I marvel at the sheer courage, and at the hair-raising motherfucking neck you have to suggest that I go to your game and cheer your team. Really, I do. (Raising his glass of Ouzo). So, here is to you. To the United States of America. A man with big balls. (He drinks the rest of the Ouzo in one gulp).
AMERICA
(For a moment America looks hurt. His smile has vanished with Greece’s words. He now has an expression of concentration on his face, as if he was immersed in algorithmic calculations. He turns round on the stool and brings his manly handsome face closer to Greece’s.)
What’s the matter with you? Huh? All I’m doing is I’m trying to be friendly to you. Drag you out of this depressing hole; get you back on your feet. And that’s your way of thanking me for it. That’s my problem. I’m always looking out for losers like you, making sure you are all right. I should do like the other guys and just leave you alone. Maybe I should listen to France, like he says: let the losers be losers if they want. You can’t keep interfering. It only gets you into trouble in the long run and you end up with a big headache and nothing to show for it. Always trying to figure out what it is exactly that you lot are whingeing about…You’re so fucking caught up in your own problems, you can’t even get your finances straight. Well, I’m fucking sick of it! Do you hear? Sick of hearing nothing but complaints from everybody. Why can’t you let bygones be bygones and get on with your fucking life?
GREECE
(Clenching a fist, as if trying to keep a hold on his rage. His tone rises with anger.)
What sort of low life do you think I am that I would go and cheer the man who helped kill my son and ruined my business? And what sort of asshole would expect sympathy from someone like me? Are you fucking insane? I was doing pretty fine here until you walked through that door and reminded me of everything. Yeah, I have my moments of darkness, who wouldn’t? And maybe I drink a little bit too much, and maybe my finances aren’t as good as they should, but I was doing all right until you decided to walk into this bar, so do me a favour and get out of here!
AMERICA
(He is stunned and his face now shows genuine concern, as if he suddenly remembered something very important. In an appeasing tone.)
Come on, Greece! You know it was an accident. You know I didn’t do it to cause you harm. I thought that your son was involved with the wrong crowd, as for your business, well, I’m sorry you fell flat on your back on that one, but, hey, business is business is business. (He pauses as if expecting a response from Greece, and tries to put his hand on his arm. Greece flinches away, and remains silent.) For God's sake, Greece, I thought your son was going to put us all in danger. You know I wouldn’t harm anybody on purpose. Come on! You know I’m a good guy. Look at me! Would I harm anybody on purpose? Would a guy like me do anything evil for the sake of it? I’m sorry I got it wrong, but there is no turning back, no matter how much you think about it. Life goes on, your life and mine, and you have to learn to put the past behind you. That was over ten years ago now, for God's sake. How many times do you want me to apologize?
GREECE
(With a slight look of disbelief on his face. He now looks as if all the energy had been sapped of him, like a punctured balloon.)
Actually, once would do. You have never apologized. Although, come to think about it, it is too late for an apology. What I suffered you would never be able to compensate for. No matter how many fucking ball games and barbecues you invite me to. I’m sorry to have to spell this out to you: YOU-ARE-NO-FRIEND-OF-MINE. So don’t expect me to act like I am your friend and nothing happened, ok? You do your thing and I do mine. We meet occasionally cause we have common friends, I will be civil to you, don’t worry. I may even let you come to my beach and bask in my sun. You’re welcome to my feta and my olives, but don’t expect me to cheer you on, and most importantly, don’t expect me to forget.
AMERICA
(Now with serious resolve. Standing up, putting some notes on the bar counter and walking towards the door.)
Fine. If that’s the way you want it. I’m glad we cleared that one up. I already have more friends than I need anyway. (The barman rolls his eyes up when he hears this.) I’m glad I now know that Greece is no friend of America. But don’t expect me to keep silent about this, Greece. Everybody will hear that you are an ungrateful son-of-a-bitch at the barbecue tonight. Do you hear? Everybody will know that you are no friend of America!
(The door closes behind America. Shutting out the glaring sunshine outside. A gloomy silence fills the room after America’s departure. The few barflies left in the joint turn back to their drinks as if nothing had happened.)
GREECE
(To the barman. In a calm, tired voice.)
Is that Ouzo coming or what?
posted by Castilian Scum at 12:30 AM |
link
|
--------------------
